Maddy's Tumblr

18. Female. Canada.

worthlessfuckholes:

feminist-rapebait:

did this person never take a high school English class?

Well, lets see here.

"Dear Kitten[comma][paragraph break]
On your list of goals you expressed you [repetitive, unnecessary] would like to read more[semicolon] please accept these with the knowledge [word use?] that that [repetition, syntax] goal is within your grasp and [No. Use a period and start a new sentence.] when you finish there will always be more. [“…to learn.” Finish the fragment.]
You can be anything you want.
I love you kitten[comma]
[indent needed] Sir Ross”

I’m fairly sure I can do better than this.

"Dear Kitten,
You said you wanted to read more: with that in mind here are some books from high school that you read until all enjoyment of them was forcibly removed. Please accept these with the knowledge that I am a pretentious windbag who hasn’t read anything in the last 30 years without an 'Oprahs book club' sticker on it. 
You can be anything you want except dazzled by my literary choices
I love you, and remind you that you are kitten again because its been a whole two minutes since I called you that and I’m worried you’ve forgotten,
Lord Master DarkCrowDangerBond.

Is your Dom a tedious, pretentious windbag? Cliffnotes™ can help! Skip over his assumed mantle of literary wisdom and instead ask him his opinion on contemporary authors: when he claims to have read The Kite Runner, or Miss Smillas Feeling For Snow make sure he cant go online and then ask him who his favorite character was. 
I fucking hate this ‘domn8-by-numbers’ bullshit. Its the three-piece polyester suit, single-malt with splenda-and-ice crowd whom I fervently wish would just die painfully of their own insecure pseudointellectual hubris.Lastly, God, FRB. You cant just ask someone why they’ve never taken HS english classes!
View high resolution

worthlessfuckholes:

feminist-rapebait:

did this person never take a high school English class?

Well, lets see here.

"Dear Kitten[comma][paragraph break]

On your list of goals you expressed you [repetitive, unnecessary] would like to read more[semicolon] please accept these with the knowledge [word use?] that that [repetition, syntax] goal is within your grasp and [No. Use a period and start a new sentence.] when you finish there will always be more. [“…to learn.” Finish the fragment.]

You can be anything you want.

I love you kitten[comma]

[indent needed] Sir Ross”

I’m fairly sure I can do better than this.

"Dear Kitten,

You said you wanted to read more: with that in mind here are some books from high school that you read until all enjoyment of them was forcibly removed. Please accept these with the knowledge that I am a pretentious windbag who hasn’t read anything in the last 30 years without an 'Oprahs book club' sticker on it. 

You can be anything you want except dazzled by my literary choices

I love you, and remind you that you are kitten again because its been a whole two minutes since I called you that and I’m worried you’ve forgotten,

Lord Master DarkCrowDangerBond.

Is your Dom a tedious, pretentious windbag? Cliffnotes™ can help! Skip over his assumed mantle of literary wisdom and instead ask him his opinion on contemporary authors: when he claims to have read The Kite Runner, or Miss Smillas Feeling For Snow make sure he cant go online and then ask him who his favorite character was. 

I fucking hate this ‘domn8-by-numbers’ bullshit. Its the three-piece polyester suit, single-malt with splenda-and-ice crowd whom I fervently wish would just die painfully of their own insecure pseudointellectual hubris.

Lastly, God, FRB. You cant just ask someone why they’ve never taken HS english classes!

(Source: xsirandhiskittenx, via feminist-rapebait)

American Horror Story: Miami Beach

(Source: niteflight, via memewhore)

ddarkahn:

This seriously happened live today on a news program in Brazil

ddarkahn:

This seriously happened live today on a news program in Brazil

(via memewhore)

porpentine:

i’m into really low commitment hangouts like lying on the floor near each other or falling asleep together or falling into an endless void together

(via no01partyblog)